Those Damaged Goods

Okay, I have some creepy stuff to say. Not creepy like.... monster creepy. But coincidence creepy. Okay, so my song Broken Girl by Matthew West says this, "Those damaged goods you see, in your reflection." The first part about the damaged goods is what gets the better of me. I searched up sexual assault side effects to see if I was different. I was, honestly. But, one of the side effects was "the feeling of having 'damaged goods'" It put a quotation on damaged goods, meaning it came from somewhere which is MY SONG! Shocking right? Okay, thats it! Gotta go do somethin', bye!

What He Does

So, last night was a little bit unbelievable, and that's on Lucas' half. Okay, so last night like always, Maya-Farkle. That ring a bell? So, Lucas took me up to the top bunk. I was sad and crying badly to myself. So, Lucas told me to calm down. I didn't know how to. He said he could help me, and then I thought of Farkle and said no. Then, Lucas said something that shocks me. He told me to wait on the bed and he was going to get something for me. For a second I thought it was Kiwi until he began shuffling jewelry and hair pins around on the shelf. He came with a bobby pin. He ripped the plastic top off, which covers the sharp parts. He gave it to me. "I can't believe I'm letting you do this." He said. "Just scrape yourself and it will make you think of that instead of Farkle and Maya and whatever is going on." He handed me the bobby pin. "Your letting me do this?" I asked. "I'll get hurt." He said not to worry and I'll be fine. So, I scraped my tiny little hand with the pin. I scraped my shoulder. He took to pin. "I can't let you do this." He said. He tossed it off of the bed and it hit the tv. Then, we decided to form a jealousy plan over Farkle and Maya. We pretended to do what I do with Farkle and what he did with Maya. So, we did that. Then my fake girly noises were getting on his nerves and and he kicked me off the. So, Lucas stayed alone up there. I was crying. Farkle came and grabbed me and hugged me he took me up on the normal bed. Then, Lucas came down and said sorry. We all were ok. I believe I must've done something stupid, so Farkle began to yell at me. I cried and tried to stay away from him. He said he didn't do anything. I told myself in my head that I was stupid.  I got up and grabbed a new pin, broke it, and broke myself. I scraped my little hand, quietly to myself. I decided to stop. "Why are you mad at me?!" Farkle asked, obviously annoyed. "You were yelling at me." I said. "What..." Farkle said shocked, but drifting away. "You yelled at me." I said again. "Riley I... I didn't know." He said. He apologized. Then, everybody was ok again. Remember the Boys and Girls Challenge? So, we basically did that again. The boys battled of who could get the most girly noises out of the girls. Maya took Lucas' side, I took their side. Lucas had to do it to Maya. I took their side because I didn't believe Farkle could do it with me. So, then we all went to sleep. I woke up the next morning. Not a mark was left on my hand or shoulder, only the ones on my wrist and arms from Matthew West. And that is what Lucas did last night. He told me to hurt myself, he was mean to Maya. He's not like that. Or... or is he?

When She Cries

So, after going out for dinner with my family (and annoyingly miserable Maya), I realized that there is a song that represents me. It really represents me. It is called When She Cries by Britt Nicole. It represents my Matthew West situation.

So, here is my official lyric video for When She Cries. I have the relation lyrics, so here they are. It will be highlighted in green if it is a representation, bolded black is not.

Little girl terrified
She'd leave her room if only bruises would heal
A home is no place to hide
Her heart is breaking from the pain that she feels

[CHORUS]
Every day's the same
She fights to find her way
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray
She wonders why, does anyone ever hear her when she cries
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsty.com/britt-nicole-when-she-cries-lyrics.html ]
Today she's turning sixteen
Everyone singing, but she can't seem to smile
They never get past arms length
How could they act like everything is alright?
She's pulling down her long sleeves
To cover all the memories that scars leave
She says, "maybe making me bleed 
will be the answer that could wash the slate clean"

[CHORUS]

Every day's the same
She fights to find her way
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray
She wonders why, does anyone ever hear her when she cries
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsty.com/britt-nicole-when-she-cries-lyrics.html ]
Today she's turning sixteen
Everyone singing, but she can't seem to smile
They never get past arms length
How could they act like everything is alright?
She's pulling down her long sleeves
To cover all the memories that scars leave
She says, "maybe making me bleed 
will be the answer that could wash the slate clean"

(BRIDGE)
This is the dark before the dawn
The storm before the peace
Don't be afraid 'cause seasons change and
God is watching over you
He hears you

Every day's the same
She fights to find her way
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray
She'll be just fine, cause I know he hears her when she cries

Every day's the same
She fights to find her way
She hurts, she breaks, she hides, and tries to pray
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries
She'll be just fine, cause now he hears her when she cries 

That was my relation lyrics from When She Cries. Thanks for reading.

Cake, Uncle Dion, Dinner!

I am so happy! My Uncle Dion wasn't supposed to end up coming today because of the roads, but it turns out he will be on his way at 3:00pm! I'm excited! We are getting a cake and he'll take us out for dinner. I'm really excited! I wonder where we'll go for dinner. I get to choose! My mom said. I do however know where I am getting cake! Dairy Queen! I'm so happy!!!!

This is a Dairy Queen Cake! I made the cake match the theme of my blog! Cool huh? Okay, wish me fun on this great event!

All These Little Things

So, the boys finally came back... yay.... (not) while Maya and I were playing Just Dance 2014 on my Wii. They came and watched us. Maya was obsessed with her red pyjamas when I said I'd cough on her. Weird. So, then we reverted to Just Dance 4 and I was obsessed with the girls on there dancing sexually. Everyone was wondering why. Why? Well because they actually were dancing sexually. The boys were cheering us on and it was kinda fun, I'd say. So, at the end when we were finished, I walked back from the kitchen. "Are you okay?" Farkle asked me. "Yeah, I'm fine." I said. I was acting weird apparently. Maya made a comment while we were playing about the Brooklyn-Connor thing, which I think I only mentioned on pages, which if you actually had access to them, you'd know. We stood there for a few seconds, and as I walked to go put the Wii remotes away, I lightly banged into his shoulder, and he grabbed onto me and hugged me. Slowly, I hugged Farkle back. We hugged each other tighter each second, not to the point we had to use much effort. "It's okay." He said. I put my head into his shoulder. "It's okay" he repeated. We let go and I went to the remotes to put them away into the Wii remote bin. I went upstairs and while Maya showered, Kiwi and I were in there too. I was thinking, "Wow, these little things can change a person." Than, Kiwi and I left, he's in his cage, and I am now here! That's it! Return to read more soon on Take On The World! Bye!

Beauty's Relation

I know that I removed the song Beauty From Pain by Superchick, but apart of me still relates to it. So, I'm going to put up the lyrics and highlight the relation lines.

The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know I'm alive but I feel like I've died
And all that's left is to accept that it's over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that i made
I try to keep warm but i just grow colder
I feel like i'm slipping away

After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday i'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

My whole world is the pain inside me
The best I can do is just get through the dayWhen life before is only a memory
I'll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though I can't understand why this happenedI know that I will when I look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames

After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday i'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

Here I am, at the end of me
Tryin to hold to what I can't see
I forgot how to hope
This night's been so long
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn


After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain 
Though it won't be today,
Someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

That's it. That's the lyrics and the relation.

Courage Lines

One of the lyrics from my new song say "face the 99" which means that there were 100 steps of getting out of something bad, and once she takes one step, she can face the 99. Basically the meaning of the song is a girl is in a bad situation, any bad sort of situation, and she feels like she will never get out. Voices in her head and people keep on telling her that there are 100 steps of getting out and once you take 1, you can face the 99. So, once you take 1 step you can face the next 99 steps of getting out. The exact lyric is, "If I can overcome step one, I can face the 99." Another line of courage says, "They think that I am staying down, but I'm not giving up tonight." So, people think that they got you down and that your fully down in the situation, but you won't give up. You'll show them up and beat the game. The next line of courage is, "I am stronger than my fears. Got 100 steps to go, tonight I'll make it 99." It says that you're stronger than your fears, and that is true. Overcome your fears, and be stronger. It says that tonight you'll make it 99, not another time, tonight is time. Now is time to overcome step 1. The last line of courage is, "I have everything to lose by not getting up to fight." If you don't get up to fight, you'll only be pushed down and defeated, and this is in any situation, not just mine. Those are my lines of courage from my song! Please don't listen to it just to know more of these lyrics, because they seem very encouraging. Don't even search them up, they're on my blog post if you scroll down. So, don't listen or do any purposeful research about my song. I am just saying! I hope I gave you more courage to stand up.